Training day at our escortservice, part 2

Half-yearly training day at Society Service: neurodiverse clients

In the previous blog you read part 1 of the report of our half-yearly training day. Before lunch we covered mindful touch, yoni and lingam massage, the G-spot and squirting. This second part is less “spicy”, but certainly no less important. We are talking about neurodiversity.

After lunch the calm returns. The sandwiches are finished, the thermos flasks refilled, the chairs back in a circle. The murmur fades into the background. One of our own escorts takes the floor. She explains what neurodiversity entails and what this means in an encounter that revolves around attention, consent and pleasure.

Neurodiversity at a high class escort service

Our escort starts with the basics: a neurodiverse brain is different, not better and not worse. She zooms in on autism, ADHD and high sensitivity. Not to label people, but to offer tools and clarify differences. Many people — including those who would not call themselves neurodiverse — recognise it immediately as soon as it is about stimuli. Sometimes light is too bright, sometimes sound distracts or annoys, sometimes a space feels restless for no clear reason. With that lens, it quickly becomes clear why extra attention to this during a booking makes a big difference.

Then we go a layer deeper. What exactly do we mean by autism, ADHD and high sensitivity. Which signals do you see in contact, pace, need for structure. And above all: what does this mean in practice. Alongside that, we immediately dismantle a few prejudices. Neurodiverse clients would feel less or have less empathy. That is not true. A lot is often felt, it just comes in differently or is shown in a different way. 

The conversation becomes practical. What can the escort do before and during a booking. What can we as an agency facilitate. And how do we make sure it stays enjoyable for everyone. I jot down notes as colleagues share experiences with neurodiverse clients. It is about small adjustments that make a big difference: going through the plan together at the start, saying what you are going to do before you do it, turning the light down a notch, music softer or off, closing a curtain if the street is restless. Agree on a simple sign for a pause if talking is difficult at that moment. Offer real choices: “Would you like to continue like this or take a short break,” instead of “It’s going fine, right.” Eye contact is allowed, not required. Silence is not awkward, but sometimes exactly what brings calm.

Communication is key

Just like in the morning workshop, communication again turns out to be the most important tool. We quickly think of verbal communication, and of course simply asking if everything is okay is very good. But non-verbal communication is incredibly important as well, and neurodiverse clients can differ in that. A small gesture to check in briefly whether everything still feels pleasant can therefore have a big effect. With consent and guarding boundaries in mind, communication is an important tool too. And let us not lose sight of the fact that consent applies not only to the escort but also to the client. A booking is only successful if both look back on a good time together. 

At the end of the afternoon I address the group of escorts. I explain a bit more about what this workshop will add to our services. As a loyal reader of this blog you will undoubtedly read more about that soon. I thank the group for their openness and attention, with a special thank-you to the escort who gave this workshop. It is always a bit tricky to wrap up; whether I organise a get-together or a training day, most people need a gentle nudge to head home. Understandable, because it is a pleasure to be in the company of such nice colleagues. 

I pack my things and head to the station. This time the train is just a bit more convenient. In the carriage I set my suitcase with demonstration dildos and artificial vagina against my leg and scroll through the clips I shot for my vlog in between. Whether it is vlog-worthy, I do not know yet. I catch myself with a big smile. If only the people around me knew. They might think this is business as usual for me. And honestly: today I can say it. It’s all in a day’s work!